ACCEPT CONSEQUENCES 6.11
Goal: To improve conflict management skills
1. The student will maintain self control when given a consequence.
2. The student will accept responsibility for behavior.
1. Decide if you were wrong.
2. If you were wrong, say to yourself "I have to accept the consequences."
3. Say to the person "Yes, I did ____." (describe what you did).
4. Say something else:
a. How you will avoid this behavior next time.
b. Apologize (McGinnis and Goldstein, 1980 p. 151)
5. Do the consequence.
Since this skill involves some problem solving, it is suggested that this skill be taught after 'Problem Solving'. (McGinnis and Goldstein, 1980 p. 151)
Definition: Every action has a reaction or consequence either positive or negative. Accepting consequence means facing what happens as a result of action. When you have done something wrong, you put yourself in the position of accepting the decision and consequences of an authority figure.
Rationale: Accepting consequences shows maturity. It also can help to avoid further negative problems that may occur from blaming, lying, or denying.
• Ask the students to list different negative and positive consequences they face at home, at school, and in the community.
• In small groups cooperative learning students are to make two lists. The first list should contain actions and their possible positive consequences. The second list - actions and negative consequences. Students should be aware that if they decide to do an action from the second list they have to be willing to accept the consequences.
• Brainstorm situations and consequences. Discuss alternative options to alter the consequences.
• Teacher discusses positive results of accepting consequences maturely (i.e. it can avoid even further more severe consequences).
• Use this skill to accept consequences when you have done something wrong.
Set the Stage:
• Have the students try to think of an action that does not have any consequences. (Conclusion: Every action has a consequence.)
Model/Role-play with Feedback
Role play situations:
• You forgot your homework assignment.
• You can't go to a movie because you didn't do your chores.
• You lost the money your friend asked you to keep for him/her.
• Your parents ground you for coming home late. You are given detention for being late to class or sent to the principal for talking back to teacher.
• Your car is taken away after a speeding ticket.
• You call someone names and get grounded.
• You lose TV privileges when you flunk a test.
• You are awarded a scholarship to go on to school for your excellent grades.
• You break your curfew and are grounded.
• You do not follow the rules at the bowling alley and are asked to leave.
• You spilled orange juice on your brother's new sweater.
• You got caught sneaking into the drive-in movie in the trunk of a friend's car. The movie manager called the police and your parents. (Walker and et al, 1988 p. 105-107)
• Your friend Barb told her a secret and you promised not to tell. You did tell. Barb found out, and now Barb is furious. (Walker and et al, 1988 p. 105-107)
• Your parents told you that you couldn't go to a party on Friday night. You went anyway, and they found out about it. (Walker and et al, 1988, p. 105-107)
• You backed into a telephone pole in your dad's car. (Walker and et al, 1988 p. 105-107)
• Students break into small groups and write script based on real life experience to present as skit for class.
• Students interview another student about the last time they received a consequence. Skill steps can be used as basis for questions.
• Student can be given checklist and asked to observe and rate behavior of sibling at home when a consequence is given to them by parent.
Application with Feedback
• This is a skill that is likely to be useful in the home setting. Parents are sent a checklist and are asked to rate students for a weekly interval. Parents can be asked to provide reinforcement if an agreed upon criteria is met.
• Teacher maintains checklist on desk and rates student whenever a consequence is given, providing feedback for student. Students who demonstrate use of all steps can be reinforced with lottery tickets or raffle chances.