RESPOND TO TEASING 6.8
Goal: To improve conflict management skills
1. The student will be able to discriminate between friendly and mean teasing.
2. The student will deal with teasing with appropriate behavior (assertiveness, acceptance, or ignoring).
1. Decide if you are being teased.
2. Think about ways to deal with the teasing (gracefully accept it make joke of it, ignore it, or assert self)
3. Choose the best way and do it. (Goldstein and et al, 1980 p. 113)
Definition: Responding to teasing is what you do after someone teases you. If the teasing bothers you, you can ignore it or assert yourself. If the teasing is friendly, you can accept it, or make a joke of it.
Rationale: It is important to respond appropriately to avoid getting consequences and so others see you as mature and intelligent. You have the right to assert yourself if the teasing is hurtful.
• Explain how to differentiate between "friendly" and "mean" teasing. It depends upon:
• your relationship with the teaser
• the teaser's tone of voice
• the teaser's body language and
• your previous experiences with the teaser.
• Discuss attention and ignoring. Talk about the effects of paying attention to or ignoring teasing.
• Elicit examples of times they have been teased and how they reacted. These situations can be used as basis for further role plays.
• Discuss with students that when possible, they should avoid alternatives that foster aggression, malicious counter-teasing, and withdrawal.(Skillstreaming the Adolescent p. 113)
• Students may benefit from review of skill, "Using I Statements."
• Discuss things you should not tease about.
• Discuss possible choices, such as ignoring, asserting self with verbal statements, teasing back in a friendly manner, or accepting the teasing and laughing at self.
Model/Role-play with Feedback
• Video: positive and negative examples.
• Teacher discusses with students how practicing staying calm will help them to better respond to teasing by preventing them from losing control. Teacher demonstrates
procedure by closing eyes, taking three deep breaths, and slowly counting to five. Students model behavior for teacher following verbal cues, either individually or in small groups.
• Do puppet show featuring teasing and appropriate responses.
• Students break into small groups and write script which demonstrates use of skill steps. Older students can be allowed to perform skits for younger students.
• Students are given a worksheet listing ten teasing comments. Students are to differentiate between "mean" and "friendly" teasing comments.
Role play situations:
• You ignore classmate's put-down when you volunteer to help the teacher after class.
• Your sibling teases you about your new haircut.
• Your peers tease you about your new girl/boyfriend.
• Your older brother is continually teasing you. He always calls you "goat face." Demonstrate how you would respond to the teasing.
• Your friends tease you about being teacher's pet when you get highest grade on science test.
• You are teased about your new hair style or clothes.
• You are teased about tennis shoes.
• You are teased about dropping your lunch tray.
• You are teased by your peers when you wear glasses.
• You are teased by your friend over not having a date.
• You are teased when you strike out.
• You are teased by peer about your after school detention.
• You are teased for getting a lower allowance than all of your friends.
• You are teased at your job because you don't know the routine.
• You miss a word in reading and a classmate teases you.
• You fall in jump rope and everyone laughs at you.
• A group of boys in a car make an obscene gesture at you.
• At recess, someone calls you "bozo."
• Someone says you have ants in your pants.
• Someone pokes at you.
• Someone is poking you or making faces at you in class.
• Your brother or sister laughs at you.
Application with Feedback
• Teacher gives the student unexpected or surprise assignments and observes the performance. Suggestions for assignments: teacher teases student about messy desk; teacher may have classmate tease student about being late (care should be taken if classmates are to be used - that the topic given will not be one likely to hurt feelings); gym teacher teases student about missing basketball shot; cafeteria supervisor teases student about choice of food. Parents can be asked to provide feedback via checklist. (Special School District 1989, p. 230-231)
• Students give self report to teacher. Students can be assigned to observe each other, with reinforcement offered when reports and feedback are given to the teacher.